The End and Whatnot

안녕하세요!

I can't believe it, but finals are almost here. Eep! Time flew this semester. Part of what made it go by so quickly for me was looking forward to Bible study every week (or, as we were recently dubbed, the Exploring Christianity Club). No matter how hard classes & homework were, I just knew that if I could make it to Thursday evening, the worst was over.

It was so great just to be able to fellowship with other believers, & have great dialogue with people of other faiths too. My spirit was refreshed & built up each time we met together. And we were able to develop a relationship with the MSA (Muslim Student Association) during the latter part of this semester, as well. God has truly blessed us in everything that He's allowed us to do - from the opportunities He's given to us to the relationships we've been able to build. It has just been amazing to watch God work this school year.

It all began last semester, a few weeks into the new school year. A group of MC students from a large church in the area decided to start a Bible study at the Germantown campus of the college. Unbeknowst to me at the time, one of the girls in my aerobics class, Libby, was a member of this founding group. I happened to run into her one cool October evening, & as we talked, I found out that she went to the same church as one of my best friends, & she was about to go to a meeting about planning a Bible study on campus. She offered to let me join them, & since I had been looking for a group of believers to meet with, I tagged along.

A little group of us crammed around a table on the bottom level of the High Tech building, discussing what books of the Bible we should read, how to structure the study, activities to plan, the time & duration of the study, people to invite, & nitty gritties like food & the budget. I sat wide eyed & amazed, drinking it all in & thanking God for the "coincidence" of seeing Libby. I took notes furiously, eager to tell my friend Lisa about it. I texted her that evening, ecstatic at the prospects.

Within the very next weeks, we had our first meeting in the cafeteria. Surrounding 3 small tables pushed together, we apprehensively introduced ourselves over warm slices of pizza. Travis, our fearless leader, passed out worksheets he'd designed for the group, & with that, we dug into the Word. I could feel God moving amongst us, & instantly felt a connection to those surrounding me. Week after week, we continued to meet, Bibles in one hand & pizza in the other, full of joy at sharpening one another & seeing the Spirit work. We grew in number, sometimes having to add a 5th table to keep everybody together.

Enveloped in the chaos that is the campus source of foodstuffs, we prayed, talked, & laughed together. We grew closer as the weeks, months flew by. I even began to feel comfortable sharing my heart with my fellow sojourners. Just as we prayed before every session, God opened our hearts & minds to see new things in His word. Passages that we'd read over & over became new again. We all began asking questions that had never before arisen in our minds, & God was faithful to showing us the answers.

I was in awe. I got a thrill every time I thought about Thursdays, & I became more eager to stay in the word during the week. It felt as though Christ was refreshing me again & again, constantly making my spirit anew. Surely, I thought, this is how the early believers felt! Those verses in Acts never seemed more real to me.

Now. Fast forward to today. 2 May - the last meeting of our group until the fall semester begins in August. I was a bit sad when Mike & Travis told me that today was the end...for now. There seemed to be a restlesness in everybody, which might be why we didn't focus as much on Ephesians 4 as we should have. How would we end the semester? I would soon have my answer.

After Matt prayed us out, Travis & Matthias ran to the computer in the room to start a little...karaoke! We laughed & shouted (& danced) our way through the Cupid Shuffle, a lil of the ChaCha Slide, Bopeep (quite possibly my new favorite Kpop song), Dirty Laundry, & others. Matt & Matthias, ever the ones to hide talents, did a little freestyling for us, & Travis sang us his rendition of...a song which I can't remember the title of. It was a memorable way to close out the year, methinks. And it excites me thinking of what God will do next semester, too!

Here is some footage of the hilarity :-)

Annnd video! Mwahaha.

I'm gonna miss these guys *sniffles*

안녕!

#Realtalk: My Relationship with God (Updated)

Wow. Where do I begin? Last year (2012), I was all gung ho about reading my Bible, praying, going to church, etc. and I wanted to deepen my relationship with God. Things went well until my Nana's health started to fail. The more ill she became, the further I felt from God. After she passed away, I read one last Psalm, and I have hardly opened my Bible since (except for Sundays during church and Thursdays at Bible study). I seem to have lost all motivation to read it. I haven't sincerely prayed in months. I don't feel like going to church most Sundays. Things that used to bother me (cursing, amongst other things) no longer prick my conscience. God feels like a fairy tale that I used to believe in, and to be quite honest, there are some days where I just want to give up and not believe at all. I turned to hair and technology to be my gods instead. For months, I have been addicted to watching YouTube videos until the wee hours of the morning, staying on CurlyNikki and feeling the urge to post and read nearly every thread, and wanting to fit in everywhere that I could possibly go on the Internet. But then I realized something: I'm miserable. My overly-anxious, melancholy personality has magnified a hundredfold and I feel like I can no longer function properly. I have become lazy, lethargic, angry, irritable, bitter, and inconsolably sad. I keep flip flopping in my decisions, unsure of what to take during the spring semester, worrying about my major...all decisions that I normally have less issues with.

Like I've said before, I go inside myself when troubled times come instead of reaching out. I did that with my professors in the fall semester and my grades suffered severely as a result. And to be quite honest, when I was a younger, 15 year old "super Christian," I never imagined that I would do it in my spiritual walk. Oh, all the pride I had (and still have!). I wish that I'd gone to the Lord instead of material things with my hurt and pain. I don't want the storm of my Nana passing to be the thing that did me in as a follower of Christ; the rabbit trail that kept me from finishing the race like my grandmother did. I can't dwell on my rocky spiritual past, but I can definitely do something about the future.

I'm struggling so much with the sin (yes, sin) of unbelief right now. I know that it's not going to be easy to uproot, but I know that with God's strength,I can be cleansed of my unbelief, have my hurts healed, and find compassion, joy and hope once again. It won't all be rainbows and sunshine, and I know that there will be days where I feel like yelling at God and giving up, but I cannot quit. It honestly feels like my heart is hanging in the balance, and I will not let Satan take over my life.

That being said, I'm committing to spending the next 120 days (from today [1 January] to 2 May 2013) in the word for at least 30 minutes per day (excluding prayer). I'm calling it Operation: Back on Track (OBOT). It will be in addition to church services, life groups, Bible study, and any other Bible-related event/activity in which I participate. For direction in this area, I'll be using books/devotionals from Precept Ministries International; from their 40 Minute Bible Studies series. Each focuses on different aspects of godliness and spirituality, and is designed to be completed in 6 weeks. The ones I plan to complete are:

How Do You Walk the Walk You Talk?
How to Make Choices You Won't Regret
What Does the Bible Say About Sex?
Turning Your Heart Toward God

If I finish those earlier than planned, I can also finish a Beth Moore study in which I left the last chapter undone: Breaking Free.

I hope and pray that each one of them will be helpful in my spiritual growth journey.
In addition to getting back into the Word, my prayer life must be reassessed. I have a wonderful book that I was going through last year called A Young Woman's Call to Prayer by Elizabeth George that I will likely restart. The author emphasizes improving one's prayer life by actually putting down the book and praying, which is encouraging. I can devote 15 minutes per day to prayer and getting back into the habit of doing it, etc.

Total, that's 45 minutes per day that I'll be spending with God. My goal is to be able to do it in the mornings, but anytime will work. My only problem when I plan things out like this is that I get too excited, think that I can do everything, get a big head about it, and then fall flat on my face within a few days. So I already have my first prayer request: humility! :-P And diligence, consistency...whatever you want to call it. I have a terrible habit of putting off for tomorrow what I could've/should've/would've done today. It will be the death of me, mentally.

I didn't mean to write so much, but my heart feels lighter right now. This was definitely something that I needed to get off my chest. I'll report weekly on my progress, what I've learned, my thoughts, where I think God is leading me next, my setbacks, frustrations, victories, good news, bad news - everything.

(I know that not everybody who reads this is a Christian or believes in God, but my faith is part of my life, and therefore, part of my blog. If you are offended by it in any way, please feel free to skip over these posts in the future, when you see them :-) )

Ciao, bellas!

Core Finals: Day 1 + Mi Pelo + Regrets

Today was the first day of studying for finals! I didn't get there until the afternoon, but only Becca, Daniel and  Andrei were at Vicente's house. It was difficult to focus because we enjoy talking about other things too, but despite the fact that we went off onto many, many tangents, we got a lot accomplished, methinks. We discussed literature a bit, and then when Stephen came, we got more into history. Becca and Daniel left, and then Allen  - our resident philosopher - came. He is probably one of the deepest guys I know, so we got our philosophy on when he arrived. I love that he's so open to learning about other people's beliefs, even when they differ from his own. We can talk about our faiths (he's Muslim and I'm Christian) without the conversation turning into a heated debate, and we end up seeing a lot more of the similarities between our beliefs instead of the differences. I've actually seen that there are many more similarities between Islam and Christianity than there are anything else. Both religions have Abrahamic roots, just like Judaism, so it makes sense. It slips my mind so often, though, that it usually takes a person of another faith to remind me of how much we share. But I digress...

Throughout the afternoon, we went onto rabbit trails about culture, religion, philosophy, science...you wouldn't believe it unless you were there. After everybody else had left. Allen and Andrei even got into this deep discussion about what time really is, the definition of 3 dimensions, time travel, quantum physics, calculus...it was amazing. I thought it was over my head at first, and I remarked how dumb I felt, but they both encouraged me to just think about it in different ways. I did, and I actually comprehended it. It totally changed my attitude and view of physics (not my favorite science) and the practicality and application of mathematics (most especially algebra and calculus). I'm looking forward to math classes now. Or even just learning math on my own. I'll show you some shots of the group - finally, faces to the names I mention so often!

SN: Andrei wanted to know why he wasn't on my blog, too. Lol. So, I wondered about just doing a Scholars Stories series, and do interviews with all of the people in the program - even the professors. What think you? Let me know what you'd think about getting to know my classmates and friends! :-)

So, now, presenting some of my fellow Scholars! (I did let them know that I'd be blogging about them, and they knew about the photos :-D ):

 

From left to right: Daniel, Andrei, and Stephen while we discussed the major points of history that we learned this semester.

Allen (left) and Andrei (right) talking about the finer points of history in the kitchen.

Vicente (left) and Stephen (right) enjoying Allen and Andrei's conversation.

Allen and Andrei deep in a discussion about the effects that religion has on culture.

In the basement: Allen and Andrei's physics and calculus oral dissertation lol. I looked on from the couch, taking in the incense that Vicente (sitting off to the left) burned. Vicente's younger sister came down to listen in, too, and she was also intrigued. Who wouldn't be?

This is a short clip I recorded during their discussion. This was the tip of the iceberg! Sorry for the poor video quality; their voices are more important than the images, though :-)

Andrei used my scrunchy to describe what time is (my mind was blown, btdubs). And speaking of scrunchies, peep the 'do! I went up to the bathroom to take out my twists, and was greeted with this (I did pin back one side with a couple bobby pins I found in my hair):

Not too bad, eh? I think I'll wear my hair out on Fridays again. I'm loving this look, methinks. Oh, and I just mixed up my cleanser for tomorrow morning. I added some Paula's Choice shampoo because of the silicones from the Pantene that are in my hair. Uggh. Ooh, and I'm DCing with Nature's Gate Aloe Vera Moisturizing Conditioner. I'll probably add EVOO, EVCO, grapeseed oil, sesame oil, canola oil, and mayhaps a carrot or two, and some mayonnaise. I'll dish in the AM.

Last but not least: Please, please, please keep those CT families in your thoughts and prayers. The fact that somebody was sick enough to murder so many young, innocent children is troubling to my soul. I was devastated when I heard the news. I work with that age group a lot, and I just cried and cried. What are we coming to?

Semester's End + Swap Haul + New Regimen

Ciao, bellas!

This semester has been craaaazy beyond belief. Finals week is quickly approaching (*gulps*), and I have so many things to read and study beforehand. I'm trying to get all As this semester, so I really need to slam into the books as hard as I can. Ooh, kind of random: The best thing about this semester has been the Bible study that some other believers started on the Germantown campus. It's really nice to go there and fellowship and talk about God's Word and pray with other Christians after a long day of being surrounded by insanity and profanity. It's so refreshing for my spirit, and I always leave feeling energised.

I don't know if I ever told y'all, but on the CN forums, I purchased some products from another curly, Breezie24, on the swap boards. Here's what I purchased from her:

Carol's Daughter Healthy Hair Butter
Carol's Daugher Tui Moisturising Leave-In Conditioner
Oyin Handmade Juices & Berries
Darcy's Botanicals Vanilla Delight Leave-In Conditioner
Curls Curl Creme Brulee
Taliah Wajid The Great Detangler

All for $43, which is pretty good, considering the lines I purchased. First off, Breezie was great to work with; everything came taped down, in great condition, and quickly. It was a pleasure ordering from her, and I'd do it again in a heartbeat :-) Second, why the heck didn't anybody tell me how NASTY that CD butter smelled?! I almost vomited when I sniffed it! My sister, who usually likes fragrances that I don't like, wrinkled her nose at it. And my brother, who is just crazy, said that it smelled like our baby cousin's diapers o_O I haven't used it and don't plan to. I just need to figure out something to do with it other than throw it out. Ugh. More on the other products in my stash post :D

I've figured something out about myself: I cannot, for the life of me, stick to one set regimen for months at a time. My techniques (styling, detangling and whatnot), yes, but products? Forget about it! I'll use something for 3 weeks, and then I move on to something else because I get bored. I like the idea of having one regimen with one way of doing things, but I can never actually do it. There are so many ways to do things, different ways to use the same product, and ways to mix things up (literally) that I never get around to sticking to anything. I'm not ashamed of it, but it's just something interesting that I've noticed about myself. At any rate, I washed my hair today. Here's what I did:

1. DCed hair last night in 4 sections (Suave Naturals Tropical Coconut + Nubian Heritage EVOO & Moringa Repair & Extend Treatment Masque + honey + EVOO + EVCO + GSO + VO5 Pomegranate & Grapeseed Extract Strengthening Conditioner).

2. Cleansed scalp with my creamy chamomile conditioning cleanser (I added about 3/4-1 tbsp of my sulphate poo; it increased the cleansing power x 10, but it was still conditioning, and it didn't foam up like shampoo).

3. Conditioned hair with TRESemme Naturals Nourishing Moisture Conditioner (the old formula; it smells like nail polish remover, and I HATE it! I need to stop by Weis and get the new formula kind).

4. Detangled one section with Darcy's Botanicals Vanilla Delight Leave-In Conditioner; tried adding gel, rinsed, and added Pantene Curly Moisture Renewal Conditioner instead; sealed with GSO.

5. Finished rest of hair with Pantene Curly, sealed with GSO, and put hair into 8 big twists, and pulled them back into a little bun.

So, contrary to my palm test, the DB doesn't mix well with my HG gel :-( I was so disappointed. It balled the conditioner up in my hair, so I quickly used the remaining portions of my cleanser to wash it out. And, let me say, that the Pantene Curly was another FAIL. I haven't been doing CG for very long, and still, my hair is just rejecting any and all silicones. I'm so sad *sniffles* I didn't feel like doing my hair during the week, so into 8 chunky twists it went, and I was able to snatch them all up into a little bun thing. No maintenance during the week, at least! This will probably be my finals style, too lol.


OAN: Forgive the image-less state of my blog. My phone is acting a fool and won't send the pics; my camera is void of both batteries and a memory card. Foo. I shall provide images, shortly, though, my fellow curlies! I know how boring this must be without images...

My 2012 Health Challenge

You may already know about the 12 Inches in 12 Months Challenge that FreedomCurl posted on her blog and in the CurlyNikki forums. I'm definitely in on this challenge, as are many other naturalistas. Alongside this hair growth challenge, I'm going to challenge myself physically as well. I've long been overweight, and this year my weight seems to have spiraled out of control. With college quickly approaching, I've realized that I don't want to be the "fat girl" on campus. I'd like to have fun picking out clothes for that long drive/plane ride to the university grounds. I want my self-confidence to increase. I owe this to my family as well. High blood pressure, high cholesterol, diabetes, and many other weight-related diseases run rampant in both sides of my family. I want to stop that cycle. Above these other reasons (however well-intentioned) is the ultimate motivation: my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. In 1 Corinthians 6:19, Paul asks the church in Corinth "Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?" I am not bringing glory to God by being lazy, eating unhealthy foods, and not participating in physical activity. So, from 1 January 2012 to 30 July 2012, I'm going to be totally changing my lifestyle: daily spiritual food, consistent exercise, healthy eating, etc. I'll be posting a detailed, seven-month plan for each aspect of this challenge (spiritual, health-wise, and hair-wise) either tomorrow or Saturday.

Hasta luego, chicas!